Sunday, December 5, 2010


Today was the last day of school...and MAN will I miss these guys...uh, GIRLS.:P. I've been in this school just one year and even I was crying today, knowing that I will never experience another scream-filled break, no more counseling sessions with our Biology sir, no more "sharing"(more like hogging without permission....oh well...whatever:P) food in our (very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very noisy) breaks, no more frenzied studying for tests we'd forgotten about, no more imitating teachers, no more name-calling(in a fun bff kinda way, as I learnt later), no more pranking, or laughing our butts off about completely random things that nobody but us find funny....

I can't stop crying.....
I don't WANT to be a grown-up college girl...I want to stay 16 forever...a little innocent (:P...hardly, but again, whatever...)clueless school girl....
The nostalgia is almost suffocating....
But I suppose, you have to face things like this, huh? Friends may come , and friends may go...but each one leaves a mark...and I'm glad I got to know these girls....I really am.

So anyway, today was the craziest day ever....
The 12th graders (note, the oldest and supposedly most "mature" *cough cough* girls in school) all held hands and made this big ring in the basketball court....
And no, we did not sing Kumbaya...
We played...Ring-A-Round-The-Roses.
I kid you not.





Okay, so maybe it wasn't the most "mature" thing to do...but it sure made the last day of school a whole lot memorable. That and the whole screaming like little 6 year-olds and running around like Energizer bunnies high on sugar....

In all, VERY fun:P
Peace^^
Maya

Wednesday, November 24, 2010



There are times when you stop and begin to think about the world you live in.And then you begin wishing you could change certain things...
The other day, I was listening to my biology sir talk about how the mortality rate of certain developing countries is higher than that of the developed ones like Sweden and the US... and all because of the better facilities that the US and Sweden have...
And then you begin to think how unfair life can be at times....A kid born in the "developing" countries will probably die a lot earlier, before he's an adult maybe, just because he was born into that poor nation.... If he'd been born American, he'd live longer....
I began wishing I could do something about that...become a doctor, maybe,(though bio is one of those subjects that make me want to pull out my hair in frustration...), and go to Ethiopia, work for free, set up hospitals......
But then this cold little voice called reason awoke. What can one lone 16 year-old, with wild dreams, who's not even out of school yet do all on her own? How the hell was I gonna change anything? I was just a clueless girl in a big cold cruel world....
But then, I guess you gotta believe in yourself right? It's not like I can't make a difference....and even the smallest one would count. So maybe I'm going to be working as a doctor in Ethiopia a few years from now.....
^_^
Peace,
Maya

Thursday, November 18, 2010

There are times when you feel trapped...
Restrictions upon restrictions are piled on you till you want to scream your throat raw or shatter glass or throw things clear across the room....
I feel like that now.
I hate my bloody life and I don't know why there's a 12th grade. Weren't 11 bad enough?
And that too during my so-called "sweet-sixteenth" year. Nobody understands and NOBODY cares....
I would be swearing if I were allowed too...

Monday, November 15, 2010



I've never really walked hand-in-hand on the beach with a guy I am in love with....
I guess I'm missing out on a lot of things...
All of a sudden, I'm depressed. I bet I'm the only teen who has gone through her whole school life without dating. No boyfriend a all....God, I'm such a loser.......Ah, well.....take things as they come, I guess, or so I've heard...It's not like I'm dead....I've still got a looong time to live...
All of a sudden, I'm feeling better...^_^
Peace
Maya

Bliss.....
To be able to lie there and watch the clouds drift by....
just blowing with the wind.
Seriously, what I wouldn't give.....
xoxoxo
Maya


Hey, I'm back... I've made a solemn promise to myself that I wil keep updating you regularly, instead of spending what little online time I get on facebook and piratebay(:P)...
So basically, my life right now is all studies.....I have my SATs coming up and just after them, I have my preboards...and the pressure is unbelievable. I'm a little more than tired of school and tuitions and anything to do with boks and there are moments when I just wish I could run away and find a nice quiet cozy place to lie down and take a nap in the sun, laze around and watch the clouds drift by in a blue blue sky, on the grassy banks of a happy brook....and then my eyes open and I have my chemistry book open in front of me, a welt in my forehead left by the pages of the book, punishing me for having fallen asleep on it.
It's sad, really....
And then there are times when I'm so stressed that I want to scream and...and break GLASS....breaking glass seems like such a perfect way to let it all out... crystal shatters and so do the walls in your mind, that aren't letting you think straight... that blocks your thoughts, forming a maze in which they are lost forever.
But I guess 12th grade is something EVERYONE has to go through, one time or the other. So the only thing to do now is grit my teeth and keep marching on (One Republic ^_^ <3)....Even this will pass....and it's said that only the the test of fire makes the finest steel, n'est-ce pas? Several tests of fire are coming up and I will make it through them....I promise that to myself....
Bring it on, CBSE!!!

Sunday, November 14, 2010




Right, so as I was saying yesterday, I realized eight months and no friends later, that maybe i should stop feeling so guarded and resentful, and maybe get to know the girls in my class who I had distanced from myself, despite their attempts to be friendly. I'd figured that maybe I was thinking the wrong way, b assuming that I would only make friends who would forget me or that I'd forget eventually. Life doesn't work that way...sometimes you meet people who touch your lives and leave a mark, like an ink drop in a glass of water. They may change you, or you may change them....but whatever the case, you'll always remember them.And so I broke that shell around me, an the difference it made in my life was AMAZING! I got to know all of them better and I'm really glad I decided to bring down the walls! Three of us went skating the other day and had oodles of fun!!! One of the best days of my life! Love you guys^_^!
xoxoxo
Maya

Saturday, November 13, 2010



It's been so so so so so so so so so long since my last entry.....
Oh wait, I think ALL my entries begin like this.
So anyway, a WHOLE LOT has happened in all this time. At the beginning of 12th grade I'd shifted to a new school, and had to go through the whole "new girl in a new school' situation again.... not that I'm not used to it.... I mean, I've been to around 5 schools already...And to be frank, I really HATED my new only-girl's school at first. It was just so different from my old one, and I felt like a fish out of water there. COMPLETELY out of my comfort zone...it was just SO WEIRD to suddenly be in an only-girls class after having studied with guys for the last 13 years....
Okay, chem tuitions in 10...will continue this entry later...
xoxoxo
Maya

Friday, August 6, 2010



Okay, so it's been AGES since i last wrote and I have an excuse (I always do :P). Life has been so hectic, what with me now being in the 12th grade and all, not to mention all the studies and homework that have been piled on us poor, weary sufferers.
And now is the time, each 12th grader has to face somthing that used to seem so far off a few years ago... something that will affect their entire future...
College...
I too have been overwhelmed by the various college choices I have had and still have to make... Which college to go to, what exams to take, where to study.....these questions are dancing around in my head and giving me nightmares...
It's a little too much to take and sometimes I wish the choices I have to take would already be taken and the my path would be laid out there for me to follow...
But then, I realise that the fact that I HAVE choices that I can make is something to be VERY thankful for....
So College, here I come....in 9 months or so^_^
xoxoxo
Maya

Monday, March 22, 2010

Braindead.....
The perfect word to describe me at the moment. A flooded with studies and assignments works just as well...
I'll probably sound like a whiny little brat but nothing seems to be happening these days. Everything is so monotonous n BORING!!!
:(

Monday, March 15, 2010

Are you....dying of boredom?
Sleep-deprived?
stressed out?
If you are, well, there's nothing i can do about it.....I'm in the same situation as you; a situation, in my case at least, that is going from bad to as bad as it can get.
Ciao, fellow sufferers

Friday, January 29, 2010


So...I've decided to change my blog background.
I really like the whole 'Fall Fun' background n hearder and all...but they're just not me. They say things like 'Elegant', 'Sophisticated' and 'Autumn'...but that's not me.
Me? I'm more a 'go-with-the-flow' person...laid-back, don't-care-ish, art-loving, childish (a lot of the time), super-sensitive at times, and as thick-skined as a rhinoceros otherwise, sentimental, adaptable and...a bit of a psycho. My mind wanders a LOT and sometimes, i walk into a room wth this fixed purpose in mind, a slight slip in focus distracts me, and the next moment, I'm standing there blankly, trying my best to remember why I'd walked into that room in the first place. My sister calls it early Alzheimers...:P...So i guess I'm a bit of a bubble-head:P
So i'm going to change ot to something that suits me more....too bad they don't have any 'chocaholic' or 'anime-lover' wallpapers...those would fit me to a T...;)



Change....now there's something that's not too easy to cope with...
But as the common saying goes, life goes on...so we either gotta live with it, or turn into a suicidal maniac (as you may have already guessed, the last part is my own modification;P)....Looking back at the way I used to be in the 8th grade, and how I am now, a year from college, makes me realise how much people (me specifically) can change...
I guess I have changed alot...and not completely for the better either. I'm the person my frieds want me to be around them...but at ome, there's a whole different Maya, with differet interests, thoughts and a WHOLE different attitude...
It's hard not to be influencedby people...and now that I think about it, I find that almost EVERYTHING I like or hate is not what Maya likes or hates...they're things she's LEARNT to like or hate, feelings that have been induced in her by the people around her...
I want the real Maya to shine out...but it's hard when you've lived in a shell for the last 3 years...
Looks like i got a lotta work to do...=S
Maya

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Memories are forever


So you're going now.

I should've realised

that Nothing lasts forever....

Not even you.


I always thought

that you'd live forever...

Longer than me, at least.

How stupid of me

not to think of

the possibilities of you

leaving the world before me.


Now, as thoughts

of your inevitable death

float in my head,

Nothing else seems to matter anymore.


It still seems unreal,

you leaving before me.

But even if you do leave,

I will not grieve...

You may not have lasted forever,

But my memories of you will.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

There should be a law against stupid physics professors being allowed to take four 40 minute sessions in one school day.....It's freakin' INHUMANE!!!
I think i'm suffering a brain shutdown....today has not been one of my better days>:(

Sunday, January 10, 2010


It's been a while since i've been here...but i have a good excuse ( always do:P ). Exams have been ruining my life since the 4th of december and i could use a little r&r...I've got black circles under my eyes for crying out loud!!! And for a school-going teen, that is NOT good ( don't think there's anyone it is good for...)....

So to relax during these times of immense stress and strain (*groan* oh lord, physics has taken its toll...), i've found out that there are some really good ways to relax without overdoing it on the straining our eyes.

Music, my friends, is the answer. Sweet,sweet music is one way to forget (for a short but blissful study break of 10 or so minutes) that tomorrow, you may face doom at the evil hands of Dr.Organic chemistry and Prof.Projectile Motion...

So here's a list of songs I've found very calming and rejuvenating:-
1.Speed of Sound-Coldplay
2.Great spirits(from the animated movie, Brother Bear)-Phil Collins
3.I'm on my way(also from Brother Bear....hard to find the English version though...but the Japanese version does just as well:) )
4.How to save a life-The Fray
5.Take a bow-Rihanna
6.Black or white-Michael Jackson
7.Oh Shanthi Shanthi(from the tamil movie, Vaaranam Aayiram)-S.P.B Charan
8.Carry you home- James Blunt
9.It's you- Super Junior
10.21 guns-Greenday
11.Wake me up when September ends-Greenday
12.Don't believe in love-Dido
13.Life for rent-Dido
14.White Flag-Dido
15.I gotta feeling-Black eyed peas
16.Bulbula-Sunidhi Chauhan
17.Mere Sang-Sunidhi Chauhan
18.Hai Junoon-Sunidhi Chauhan
19.Taare Zameen par-Shankar Mahadevan
20.Maa-Shankar Mahadevan
21.Fireflies-Owl city and Adam Young
22.Lithium-Evanescence....etc.
Along with these were a bunch of songs by Kelly Clarkson, One Republic and Nickelback(some of my fave artists...)....
So, here's to all my fellow students who have exams coming up....hope y'all find this list helpful...(and just so you guys know...i totally sympathise with you guys...):)